'But it is so easy for you. You are so talented and good at everything. Not all of us are as talented as you. So unfair,' she said. And i hate this word, I feel like all the credit of my hard work is going in wain by considering it as just luck.
We were having a conversation about loving what you do and doing what you love and whether it is indeed possible to follow your passion and make a decent living out of it.
I wanted to tell her that most people saw only the sheen, not the grit, nor the passing through the cogs a million times, bearing the pain as you discovered you were much stronger than you thought and that you did not crumble after all.
I wanted to tell her about the thousands and thousands of things I have done before I was considered worthy in whatever i am doing right now. I wanted to tell her about the back-breaking hours of meticulous research I have done, How i have spent almost sleepless night just to do some really minor issue with code. Just to make sure that the facts I am stating are accurate.
I wanted to tell her about that accident day before my 10th board exams and how i have written my papers with that broken finger. Just to see smile on face of my dad i have ignored the pain. Life is so much easy for me i never have to thought about what i wanted to do. I just wanted to do that everything which my dad was not able to do , due to that responsibility of family at early stage of his life.
I wanted to tell her about the time I cried and cried when I lost my dad, and the people I considered 'friends' turned away and how strangers who I just met turned out to be my biggest support systems (and later good friends). [ Hey doctor, this one is just for you :) ]
I wanted to tell her that the best way I discovered to overcome my grief was to immerse myself in work and more work. I wanted to tell her about all the opportunities I had grabbed even the seemingly useless ones, because I was so afraid that if I did not, the void that was inside me would engulf me.
I wanted to tell her that I wrote and I painted as I had finally found my calling. I wanted to finally tell her that 'I really think it is not about talent, it is about hard work. But most people do not seem to see that.'
But I do not think she wanted to hear that....
So I smiled and said "Yeah, you're right you know. Some people have all the luck. It is so unfair."
